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Coming back to me myself and I.

05th Nov 2011 | Subscribe via RSS

I am about to go off on a rather self indulgent rant and I am not sure how much sense it will make to anyone but here I go…

I’ve always used my own body for most of the nudes I paint, this started for purely practical reasons…..but I never dared to paint a self portrait of my own face, that is until last year, and since then I just can’t seem to stop.

More recently I’ve been delving into the realm of double portraits, shifting my focus from trying to capture the essence of an individual, beauty, identity and image to trying to capture moments of duality, interactions and a sense of otherness. So why am I still using myself?

Artists and musicians choose subjects which are of primary concern and importance to them, whether this is love, nature, architecture or politics. I think that painting or making art or music in general is an expression of self – is an attempt, not necessarily conscious to create something which reflects and illustrates our internal landscape. I realized that mine is mainly based on feeling rather than intellectual, practical or physical concerns. I live in a sea of constantly shifting emotions surrounded by a strange sense of mysticism – I’m constantly aware of minute unspoken moments between people, the emotion of which I often find quite overwhelming. I sometimes feel a bit like an emotional sponge. There is a melancholy, a sadness and a yearning for beauty and perfection but not always in a negative sense – often in a quite beautiful one.

I think it is that mixture of overwhelming emotion which I am trying to express through my art – and so it makes sense for me to use my own face and body as a way of doing so, and if that means I am completelyegocentric then I suppose I’ll just have to come to terms with that.

10 Responses

Sarah (Newbloodart)
05th Nov 2011

I love these new works by Rebecca and the concept of working through something psychologically via self-portraiture. Aside from the convenience of using ourselves as models I believe it can deepen our understanding of ourselves to look into our own eyes and paint what we see – far from being narcissistic or ego-centric I think there is a beautiful humility in learning to truly face ourselves and that this can start through the eyes.

Dave Mcleeland
06th Nov 2011

Interesting comments – can you really read all of that from (in this case) pretty thin copies of photographs?
I don’t paint, personally – but I don’t see these as well-made paintings.

Miranda Fontaine
06th Nov 2011

I used to do a lot of self-portraits and sometimes use my own body for nudes. The advantage of using yourself as a model is you don’t have to ‘please’ your model and you don’t have to do drawings when you’re not really in the mood. I think Rebecca’s paintings are very expressive and have much more impact in ‘real life’ as their large size and wonderful textures can’t be appreciated
from a photograph. As Dave doesn’t paint, I’m not sure what he means by ‘well made’.

Georgina Vinsun
06th Nov 2011

Fascinating post, it’s really interesting to read about the thought behind your current body of work. They’re such successful, refined paintings – I love them!

Dave Mcleeland
07th Nov 2011

‘As Dave doesn’t paint, I’m not sure what he means by ‘well made’.’ I used to paint. I guess that I still use my eyes anyway and avoid reading about the ambitions of a painting in order to understand it. Besides, photographs generalise visual information and deaden space. Great in themselves as they’re own genre, but when painted from they give no sense of emotional depth. Only ‘interestingly-conjured-up’ thoughts support the idea of a lot of contemporary portraiture.
There’s no sense of anima to these portraits and the colours and scale are scarily intense. Guess that’s how we see ourselves.
By the way – I’m not writing this in order to offend anyone – I still think that Rebecca’s got a lot of talent.

Rebecca Fontaine-Wolf
07th Nov 2011

Firstly I have to agree with Dave, I think artwork should speak for itself and you shouldn’t have to read a long essay about it in order to understand it. In fact I have had many heated discussions with people about this exact point, so I can’t help but find it pretty funny that this is how my post is being interpreted!

Rather than stating my ambitions it was more of a dialogue I had with myself trying to figure out why I seem to have become stuck on self portraits. I had my doubts as to whether to even post these thoughts on this blog for the exact reason of what has happened here. If you let people inside your private thoughts you are opening yourself up to criticism on a level which is deeply personal.

All I hope to convey with my work is a mood, to evoke the kind of feeling which lead me to paint it in the first place. Whether this has been achieved or whether these are even ‘well made’ paintings (whatever that means) is obviously open for debate and is a matter of opinion. ( although Dave finds that ‘the colours and scale are scarily intense’ which one might say is exactly what I was aiming for…..)

These Pieces are my first attempts at crossing over into this new territory and as such I can appreciate that they might not be as accomplished as I would like.

Rebecca Fontaine-Wolf
07th Nov 2011

I would also like to add that it is always easy to say you’re not ‘aimimng to offend’ in hindsite, but what other effect could such biting comments really have? Everyone is more than entitled to their opinions, even if they will offend! but maybe we should be aware of this when commenting on such a personal subject.

Theresa Reilly-Cooper
08th Nov 2011

I personally think that Fontaine-Wolf’s paintings are incredible. To work on such a large scale with such confidence especially when painting yourself if an incredible thing. I only wish I could summon the courage to produce a self portrait on such a scale. Although the reasoning behind your new obsession with using yourself as a model has encouraged me a lot. Keep up the good work, I will continue to enjoy your work as well as experience mild jealousy at how beautiful they are!

Sarah Ryan
11th Nov 2011

Interesting posts… everyone I speak to thinks Rebecca’s artwork is just brilliant. Art wouldn’t be art if it didn’t generate discussion and opinion and in my opinion the best art usually creates the most passionate debate.

Michael Wallace
18th Dec 2011

Your website has inspired me to really change the way I blog. Just saying thanks for your great work.

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